Will the fear ever go away?

Not long ago I wrote an article about overcoming your fear to reach your dream {you can read the article here}.

The article spoke about fear women have not just in property investing but in everything in life. It seems no matter what we are up to or what stage we are at in life fear seems to be lurking just around the corner. Waiting to halt us in our tracks.

I speak to so many amazing, smart and strong women on a daily basis. Sometimes it’s just a check in while other times it’s a more in-depth discussion, and as strong and accomplished all these women are and no matter how much they have achieved, fear still rears it’s ugly head time and time again.

Now some fears are very real to some women and take a lot to overcome while others are smaller fears that could possibly be mistaken for excuses. And I am just a susceptible to fear and allowing it to control me and hold be back. I currently have a fear of driving after a recent car accident. It was actually quite a while ago, but I still get anxious when I see braking lights.

But one conversation has really thrown me recently and makes me wonder if there is ever a point in our lives when we are fearless. It was a conversation with my Nan. She, out of all the amazing women in my life, would have to be the most fearless. In fact I have never seen her show fear before…ever….until now.

On a recent lunch with her friends my beloved Nan tripped and fell, injuring her knee and shoulder {she described it as ‘ONLY’ injuring her knee and shoulder….as if it was a small graze or a paper cut!}. As bad as those injuries can be for a woman of 85, the main injury that has her fearful is how much it has shaken her confidence. Of course, she still managed to throw in a joke about tomato in her hair, but this was followed with “I’m just so scared it will happen again”.

Of course, being my Nan, she thought about this for all of a second before declaring “I’ll just have to be more careful next time”.

With this conversation in mind, I guess the answer to the question, will the fear ever go away is ’No’. We all will have fears of some type throughout our lives. But that’s okay, as long as we don’t let the fear stop us.

 

We all will have fears of some type throughout our lives. But that’s okay, as long as we don’t let the fear stop us.

 

My nan is fearful that she may trip again, but she knows that the fear of falling is not going to stop her going out and having a good time {and boy does have a good time}!

Just like my fear of having a car accident is not going to stop me driving. And just like a fear of making a mistake in property should not stop you from starting or continuing on your property journey.

The oxford dictionary describes fear as: ‘An Unpleasant emotion caused by the threat of danger, pain or harm‘. We are not fearful of actually doing something or something happening to us…we are fearful of how that event will affect us in the future. False evidence appearing real, is often how Fear is described.

 

FEAR ~ False Evidence Appearing Real

 

Whatever you are fearful of, there are steps or actions that you can take to put fear back into perspective and push through the fear:

1. Recognise your fears as real: When we’ve had an accident or an incident that has created fear, it can be hard to ‘get back on the bike’ so to speak. But unless you want fear to hold you back, then you need to address the fear you have, acknowledge that you are fearful, and make a plan to reduce the chance of the accident or incident happening again. Just like my Nan acknowledged that the fall happened, realised she is not as steady on her feet as she once was, and made a plan to be more careful next time.

3. Action: Action is a great way to reduce your fear, with anything you do. We are all fearful of what we don’t know or haven’t experienced. So to make a plan and take action to do things you haven’t done before, will minimise the fears. Most fears are created from our overactive imaginations. Replace the imagination with experience and the fear will be gone.

3. Knowledge: If you are not ready to take action just yet to reduce your fears, then seek out someone who has experience and learn from them. Chances are very high that whatever goal you have set yourself, someone has been there before you and is more than willing to share their experience. Buying or building property is definitely an area that has been covered by many people before you. Asking questions and gaining knowledge from these people will no doubt give you the boost you need to squash those fears once and for all!

Remember, Everything you ever wanted is on the other side of fear and the only thing we have to fear is fear itself.

 

If you have a story about overcoming fear then please share in the comments below.

To squash your fears and build your confidence in property, then sign up to the Academy to grow your property knowledge.

Until next time…

Katie Marshall - Chicks and Mortar

Chicks and Mortar – Women in Property[/fusion_builder_column][/fusion_builder_row][/fusion_builder_container]

2 thoughts on “Will the fear ever go away?

  1. Jayne says:

    So many nuggets of wisdom in this, Katie, thanks for sharing. I’m always amazed at the resiliency and lack of apparent fear my 90 year old Gran shows. Having her car taken away from her was her biggest fear released. Yet despite this she’s fine! The world did not explode! Her head did not drop off even though she complains her ‘legs were taken off her’ 🙂 Life goes on. So I guess the lesson for me is its ok to is sit in the fear for a while. That leaning into it and doing it anyway is the only way to get past it. And most of all, I’m not alone! Give your Nan a hug from me:) x

    • Chicks and Mortar says:

      Thanks Jayne, I will give her a big hug for you next time I see her. She also had her license taken away a few years ago, and it hasn’t slowed her down one little bit. 🙂

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